The Player's Counters

By The Player
Pick-up Specialist

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The Player's Counters
As most experienced men know, women stroll into clubs and bars with a fully stocked Rolodex of rebuffs and carefully worded initial rejections that are merely designed to test your level of interest. Of course, before utilizing any of the following counters, you must be certain the girl in question is indeed testing you or is -- at the very least -- a bit unsure of her rejection. You should be able to spot flat-out refusals and if you can’t, don’t automatically assume that every target is merely playing hard to get; that only leads to rude and even reprehensible behavior. However, if you’ve caught the whiff of coyness or reserved shyness that could very well indicate future appreciation, you can attempt a counter that will earn you certain favors and her respect. These slick get-arounds can be effective, but remember: You have one shot at it. If it fails, another attempt will lead to the aforementioned issue of harassing the ladies.


Line:“I don’t know you well enough.”
Response: It’s one of the most frustrating lines a man can face, but if you put in the requisite effort, things can turn in your favor. Offering to learn more about her will reveal the truth as well. She was either fishing for a proactive response on your part, or the rough translation is, “I don’t want to know you well enough.” But, in my experience, it’s more often the former option. Therefore, prepare the counter using some candid agreement and honesty, followed up by a proposal that involves nothing more than talking and being cordial.

Target: Sorry, I just don’t know you well enough.

The Player: (shrug) Well, of course not. We just met. And it’s really tough to get to know anyone in here.

Target: (nodding) Yeah, I know. I can barely hear you.

The Player: Exactly. Rather than screaming at each other, how about we just go somewhere and talk? We’d get to know each other a little better, you know what I mean?

Target: Well… now?

The Player: Entirely up to you. We could go now or whenever you’re ready to leave. Just a cup of coffee or whatever.

Target: (smiles) OK, sure.

Line: “I’m really tired.”
Response: Logically speaking, it’s highly unlikely that the clock matters in the slightest and only a little less unlikely that she’s too tired for a simple flirtatious meeting. She got all dressed up and hit the club, didn’t she? You have to remember that “I’m tired” is often common code for, “I’m not sleeping with you tonight.” Well, the standard interpretation of that isn’t entirely negative. She’s not necessarily ruling out future encounters, but for that to happen, you need her phone number, right? With it, you two can talk at a later time -- when she’s less “tired.” It should sound like this:

Target: It’s just that I’m really tired tonight.

The Player: Oh, me too. It’s been a tough day; I won’t be sticking around for much longer.

Target: You’re leaving too?

The Player: Yeah, I didn’t really plan on doing much tonight, anyway. Just wanted to get out and then get some sleep.

Target: I guess I’ll do the same thing.

The Player: (making to leave) But maybe we can talk later. I’m a little busy tomorrow but I could give you a call some time next week, if that’s OK .”

Target: Yeah, that’d be great.

Two more popular lines, with the Player's counters, after the jump...

Line: “I don’t date guys I meet in clubs.”
Response: Yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “Why else would she be there?” But really, this is one of the more common rebuffs. And while it’s true that some women are there to tag along with their friends and aren’t interested in “the scene,” many also believe every nasty stereotype associated with “club guys.” Therefore, you need to take the opportunity and dispel those beliefs by proving that nice guys do in fact frequent that often-intimidating “scene.” Be nice, be polite, be subtle; in short, be everything she wouldn’t expect you to be.

Target: I don’t date any guys I meet in clubs.

The Player: (smiling) Oh yeah? Why not?

Target: Oh, I don’t know… I guess I just don’t go for that type.

The Player: (still smiling) "Type," huh? Well, I guess I can understand that. I’m not always too proud of my male brethren when I go out.

Target: (laughs)

The Player: Not all single people who go out to meet others at clubs are sleazy, you know. I wouldn’t want to meet that kind of woman, either… That is why I’m talking to you.

Target: (shy smile) Oh, well, thanks, I guess.

The Player: (laughing) Oh, come on. Give me a chance to prove that we’re not all the same -- and make up for some of the stupid things those guys are doing over there.

Target: (smiling) Yeah, well, at least they’re not your friends. OK, I guess so.

Line: “I’m coming off a breakup.”
Response: They usually don’t volunteer any further information and it’s typically a bad idea to ask something like, “Oh, sorry… How long ago was it?” This puts the woman in an awkward position because it’s not exactly an opening topic between two strangers and, furthermore, your question might imply that you don’t believe her. The best thing to do is simply offer up a noncommittal note of sympathy, say you can relate, and you understand her caution. However, you’re just there to talk -- a good, clean conversation between two people who seem to enjoy one another’s company. Nothing wrong with that.

Target: It’s just that I’m coming off a bad breakup.

The Player: Oh, sorry. Well, I’ve been there too. It’s no fun.

Target: (shakes head) No, it sure as hell isn’t.

The Player: Well, you’re here, aren’t you? You’re moving on and that’s a tough thing to do.

Target: (shrugs) I guess so. It still feels funny being in here with all of these guys coming on to me.

The Player: I’m guessing they’re not getting very far.

Target: Nope.

The Player: Then I won’t bother you any more if you want to be left alone. But I just thought we could talk. Like I said, I’ve been through it too… And it’s better to talk, sometimes.

Target: (pause) That makes sense. I just don’t want to dive into anything, you know? So, just talk?

The Player: Just talk.

get your game on
Very few women will respond instantly and positively to your approach. Most will make you work for it, which is why you need to be sensitive to her mood, tone of voice and body language. If what you’re seeing is in contrast to her halfhearted rejection, the previous counters could work wonders. If it doesn’t fly, it’s time to move on.


source: askmen.com